A choice!

Making choices is inevitable

for life's not a spread out meal.

For twenty years I've made them.

choices that were right and fair.

I was seemingly right as rain,

but then it struck me,

perhaps they were all just made,

made for me!

Today I'm lost. Confused and battered

like a boat hit by the storm.

I'm here because I chose to be,

but burdened by pain you can't see.

Clearly my choice proved wrong,

but I can't go back.

Standing in the face of failure, in the face of the dark,

I've to strive and make myself strong.

As long as I'm ME,

An unconquered mountain, it can never be.

I've to push myself forward

I've to pull myself tall,

and give it a decent fight,

and conquer the fall.

I'm Lost. Confused. And battered

like a boat hit by the storm.

I'm here because I chose to be,

but burdened by pain you can't see.

Carrying a fake smile on my face,

I feel so out of place

Oh! I wish I could tell,

I wish I could show,

how friends have changed,

how words have lost their value.

I've receded to the back of their mind,

newfound leisures have made them blind.

Blind to my hurting thoughts,

indifferent to the demonic loneliness,

that has engulfed me.

I'm in solitude, as I sing

for such ' far off ' friends,

plaintive numbers.

No one can tell what it is,

or the overflowing sorrow as it is.

I'm lost. Confused and battered

like a boat hit by the storm.

Choices of life, choices for life,

all done wrong, quite long ago

have shown their impact today.

It's beyond time

amendment holds no name,

sorrows and pain,

troubles and failures,

have mounted up by the day.

I'm standing at the fork,

waiting for the guiding light,

to help me choose the way.

that which'll clear up the mess

of yester years,

and show me happier, merrier,

tomorrow's cheers.